What if?

A situation suddenly pop out in my mind.
What if she had not been taken that time,
what kind of life she would have?
What kind of life we would have now?
Would she be healthy?
Or
Would she be suffered for her disease?
Will I have my thoughts right now?
Would I stick to the previous subjective?
Or
I will change because of the situation?
Would I change?
What would be happened if that time I did not take the step out?
Would I have those experiences that I have now?
Would I have change my perspective on life?
Would I be a person that I never want to be?

What if....

I am just a human

Can I?

I never have doubts on myself
Once I have decided on doing something,
          I will just proceed within having any hesitation.

This situation has changed two years ago.

I just do not know about myself anymore
   Doubts?
               Disappointments?
                                         Anger?
                                                   Confusion?
 I could not imagine how neurotic I am now.

Today,
lots of thoughts pop out in my mind.

I need to be honest to myself
I need to face the real me, no matter how bad it is.
I need to feel the true emotions inside me.
I need to accept that
                               I am just a human
                                                who makes mistakes
                                                who grow with failures
                                                who can cry
                                                who deserves joys

I will be fine, time tells.

Thank you for being with me.


                            

Listen to the heart.

Last time,
I used to not believe that
I can get on to my journey even if I left something behind remain unsolved
I was wrong
I can't really move on, when the issue is there
  haunting me, circling in my mind.

After all,
time passes two years.
Within these 2 years
I really achieved something, get recognition.
I really thought I can move on,
Indeed,
           still, I am there.

I try to get back to the previous life
           get back the previous energy
                                                      in doing things that I like,
                                                                            and I would like to achieve.
I am wrong.
My energy level is not as high as previous time
My physical could not catch up with my mind.
I hate that
              my soul is being trapped in this body
 But, I could do nothing and only listen to the body

Listen to the heart.
Do not panic.
Follow the voice from the heart
and you will found the way.